Fear And Loathing In DEDust

This is some kind of very clever parody of gaming journalism.

You know you’re in trouble when your gaming is interrupted by a scream of “come on you f**kers, who’s first?” Things generally go south from there if, when you turn around, you find a completely naked man with a giant erection standing in the middle of the room, beckoning for someone to come over and sit on his lap.

“What the f**k?” I said, turning to my opponent in a now paused game of Rise of Nations. He laughed and leaned towards me so that our crazed colleague couldn’t hear – quite unnecessary, as he was now loudly harassing someone at the far end of the room – and said, with that glint in his eye and half choked laughter in his throat, “we spiked his soup with sextasy.”

“What the f**k is sextasy?” I asked, ever the innocent farm boy.

“It’s E[ecstasy] and Viagra,” my opponent turned guru explained. “E can make you go limp, which is a bitch because it makes everything feel so much better. Mix E with Viagra, though, and you solve that problem.”

Yes, I am frequently accosted by large priapic men while playing real time strategy games.

Those ritalin junkies at Corpnews have more.\’c2\~

  • Megaera

    Wow. Its not everyday you read the phrase “priapic men”, and I suspect I’ll never again read the phrase “large priapic men … playing real time strategy games”.

    Bravo Lum! \\applause

  • Megaera

    O…Kay…. after reading the post below… there appears to be a phallus theme running today. /ponder

  • scottj

    Sometimes a pickle is just a pickle.

  • galt

    and sometimes Freud disagrees

  • grant

    Hmm, what if you ARE a large priapic man?

  • GreyPawn

    Some gamers can’t help but get a rise out of Rise.

  • http://www.nut-shack.com/phpBB2/index.php Kithias

    It’s de_dust, nub.

    [PriapicWarriors] Kithias (headshot) [MMODevs] Lum

  • Bobwl

    large priapic men – I smell a really bad Guild name

  • http://ve3d.ign.com/ Apache

    We can only hope that the Roundtable in Vegas will meet and beat these lofty expecations!

  • chabuhi

    Isn’t “priapic man” redundant?

  • http://projectparadox.f2o.org/ Stephen W.

    If only all “word of the day” entries were like this, we’d all have much larger vocabularies. I’ll certainly never forget the meaning of priapic after this.

  • perianwyr

    The presence of the “gaming addiction addict doctor” in the article tells me it is bunk, I am glad they made her picture so big.