How To Win Friends And Influence People

Posted on December 21, 2006 by Scott Jennings| 27 Comments

What you miss if you’re not in a raiding guild

This entry was posted in Stupidity, WoW, _. Bookmark the permalink.
  • http://www.thisisnotacommunity.org D-0ne

    Sadly I remember most raids being just like that…

  • http://blogs.chimpswithkeyboards.com/vanhemlock/ VanHemlock

    “ITS NOT ROCKET SURGERY”

    Outstanding! Am I alone in getting Police Academy flashbacks while reading through that?

  • http://www.damnedvulpine.com J.

    “ROCKET SURGERY” needs to enter MMOG parlance somehow.

  • http://www.imperfexion.org/ Dan Hulton

    “God I hate people. There is not a bus big enough to run over the people I hate.”

    I’m officially in love. Were I female, I’d consider marrying that man. As it is, I’m considering switching teams.

  • TPRJones

    I like him. He actually uses proper grammer and punctiation when being a douche. It’s classy.

  • xzzy

    I’ve been in guilds where someone talking like that probably would have improved things quite a bit. In controlled quantities that is.

  • anarch

    It’s times like these I really miss my old raiding guild.

  • http://midnight-guild.org Mist

    He obviously learned that from me.

  • IanB

    That’s my server!

  • VPellen

    “Listen, I don’t care how you did it in your guild. Your guild sucked. That’s why you’re in my guild.”

    This stuff is gold.

  • Freakazoid

    That guy has some brass balls.

    I wonder what his guild retention rate is?

  • Larry Lard

    >> \’e2\’80\’9c[ITS NOT] ROCKET SURGERY\’e2\’80\’9d needs to enter MMOG parlance somehow.

    You know, I think it just did. And it’s actually funny, unlike “50 dkp minus”.

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  • http://www.dreadguild.org Buur

    I find myself both happy and sad that this type of thing doesn’t take place in my guild.

  • Gwaendar

    > I find myself both happy and sad that this type of thing doesn\’e2\’80\’99t take place in my guild

    Only if you also have access to officer’s chat can you be certain that it really doesn’t :)

  • Gwaendar

    That guy sounds like fun. Here’s what he frontpaged on their guild website after they downed the 4 horsemen:

    “Defeating The Four Horsemen should be resume worthy. I should be able to use it as a pickup line. Infact I’m going to. Now that we’ve defeated this encounter I’m pretty sure I am actually qualified to teach advanced physics or something. Content like this is addictive and I wish I could fight The Four Horsemen every day. If you’re in a guild that is still working thier way towards The Four Horsemen and wondering if it’s still worth it with the expansion on the horizon, do yourself a favor and stick it out. And then punch yourself in the face for being a little bitch.”

    http://www.juggernautguild.com/index.php?showtopic=16426

  • Boanerges

    I wonder what his guild retention rate is?

    On the one hand the guy is a total jerk. You’d have to wonder why anyone hangs around.

    On the other, his guild seems quite successful. Consider that Furor and FoH weren’t that much different. Brings back memories of (paraphrased) “If you can’t play 40 hours a week and crap in a bucket to stay at your computer we probably don’t want you”. Lots of people like this running guilds, sadly.

  • aaron

    Ya, retention. Apparently this is one of the few horde guilds that have KT on farm. So that explains alot.

  • http://www.grimwell.com Grimwell

    This guy reminds me of a boss I once had. Literally. Nothing but abuse each and every step of the way. Didn’t matter how well you did your job, it was abuse. I destroyed him. It felt good.

    I’m more and more glad I didn’t get hooked by WoW for some strange reason. Don’t have to deal with crap like that.

  • Selby

    Wow! That’s almost identical to my previous raid guild experiences. On one hand it was funny as hell at times, but then it got real damn annoying too. I don’t raid anymore for a reason…

  • Amaranthar

    I’m not into the raid thing due to the time and intensity required, but this also reminds me a little of the old UO guilds with PKers and Anti’s. Not in scope ala the raid, but in the leadership thing. Sometimes you have to kick them in the rear to get it going right. Drill sergeant stuff.
    I don’t think players mind if it’s just “in the moment” stuff, and if the guy is cool otherwise. Because we all understand the heat, maybe even like it if it works.

  • sinij

    I had guild leader like that back in early UO days, guy had some *rage* in him. It also worked for him, people would listen and we would win clear majority of all PvP fights, even with bad odds.

  • http://midnight-guild.org Mist

    Some of you people need some thicker skin. Don’t you remember playing Mike Tyson’s Punchout? Having to drill those fights over and over to get them right? Raiding is just the same thing with more people. Punchout was fun because it was hard, and because you had to actually practice. But somehow ‘hard’ and ‘practice’ don’t fit into the paradigm for MMOs?

  • http://www.grimwell.com Grimwell

    Punchout was hard? N00bler!

    It’s not the hard that sucks, its the stream of filth, hate, and bile that this guy was spewing at his team that makes him #1 asshole, nofunguy in my book. If that is how you organize and motivate your people — you aren’t a leader worth following.

  • Freakazoid

    Great. Now I’m imagining a raid entirely done in punchout quotes.

    [Leader]:”Stick and move, stick and move!”
    [MT]:”He’s hurt me, doc!”
    [Leader]:”Don’t give up mac! fight!”
    [Leader]:”Listen mac! Dodge his punch then counter-punch!”
    Kel-Thuzad: “I’ll give you a TKO from tokyo!”
    [Healer1]:”Do I have time to take a nap before the fight?”
    [Hunter1]:”Do you like my new trunks? They are size XXX Large! ha ha ha!”
    [Leader]:”Keep your guard up!”
    [MT]:”Help! Doc!”
    [Leader]:”Join the Nintendo fun club today, mac!”
    Kel-Thuzad:”I don’t smoke… But tonight, I’m gonna smoke you!”
    *raid wipes*
    [Mages]:”Hey! Is this kid a joke? Where’s the real challenger?”
    [Hunter1]:”ha ha ha! I am the king! ha ha ha!”
    [Leader]:”Your experience doesn’t match mine. Go home and practice.”

  • Mandella

    To Grimwell: I dunno, that webpage really doesn’t let us know if the guy also commends his people for doing the job well or not. Or actually it rather implies he does, since the page seems to be more humorous tribute than a bitter condemnation.

    More a roast than an attack, I think.

  • Evangolis

    He does say nice things about his guild on the front page, but in this case I read it as classic abuse/make-up behavior. I’ve seen top flight competitive guild leadership, and it wasn’t like this. I’m going to vote jerk, amusing from a safe distance.