Category Archives: Meta

Bored Artists: The Devil's Playthings

Email to an emailing list set up quickly for the survivors of Monday’s purge: “So let’s all get together tomorrow afternoon and compare notes.”

Me: “OK, if I can get there, since I’m currently sitting in a dentist’s chair and can’t feel my jaw.”

Matthew Weigel: “Pics or it didn’t happen.”

Me: (shrugs) “OK, you asked for it.” (flips iPhone around, takes extremely unflattering self portrait with numbed-open jaw)

Eric Kearns: “I present: Lum the Vlad!”

If I cross my arms, you can't see me.

If I cross my arms, you can't see me.

Jon Jones: “I went with a different approach.”

This should help with my new career as a Vegas lounge singer.

This should help with my new career as a Vegas lounge singer.

Everyone: “Those are great! You should post those on your blog!”

Me: “Sure, it’s not like I’m looking for work or anything!”

Hi, Recession!

Farethewell, John Deere Tractors Online, we barely knew ye. (John Deere Tractors Online is what we jokingly told people we were working on. Because, hey, tractors.)

Farethewell, John Deere Tractors Online, we barely knew ye. (John Deere Tractors Online is what we jokingly told people we were working on. Because, hey, tractors.)

So, I’m unemployed today.

Lots of games never ship. I’ve worked on two now. Suffice to say that it is getting old. :)

I don’t really want to talk too much here about my last project. As a condition of my severance I can’t discuss a great deal, and anything I say here will most likely be picked up by the MMO news sites (wave, wave!). Plus I’m still a bit sore since I think what we were working on was pretty damned cool (if nothing else, it was *nothing* like World of Warcraft) and I’m a sad panda that it won’t make it out the door.

This is also the first time in almost a decade that I don’t have something already queued up and ready to go the day I pick up my severance package. Which, given today’s climate, is KINDA FRIGHTENING, YOU KNOW? I have some possibilities (most of which involve our entire team – having the proven ability to come up with a client/server MMO prototype in 6 months is Kinda A Big Deal) but nothing definite.

Today I get to file for unemployment, for… um… pretty much the first time, ever.

Whee.

So, tomorrow, I’ll get back to snarky Youtube videos, promise.

A Brief Meta Note

Today was my last day at Webwars. The parting was on amicable terms, and I’m sure that they’ll have something you can dork around with soon enough. If you’re a designer looking for work, they’re hiring! (And yes, that’s the position I used to hold.) They’re good people, and I highly recommend applying if you’re a bad enough dude to rescue the President.

I have a new gig, which as of now, and most likely for quite a long while, I can’t talk about. Sorry. Rest assured I’ll be mouthing off all about it once I can.

We now return you to the endless PK vs. Carebear debate, already in progress.

And Now, Another Poll

Prompted by nothing in particular:

I'm Not Your Viral Marketer

In the past three days I’ve gotten four seperate appeals to hype their thinly-related-to-gaming product. I just now got one from an ad agency representing a national TV network, hyping a flash game. 

Clearly, my role has shifted, from “ranter” to “analyst” to “game developer” to that oh-so-trendy term – blogger.  And thanks to my doing this for, god, way too long now, I apparently am at the top of everyone’s marketing email spam lists.

Some of which are good. I like Paradox games. Paradox sends me press releases and the occasional beta (Hearts of Iron III, k? thx). I don’t mind hyping them, because they make niche products that in the main, I really like. This is a positive example of symbiotic viral marketing. I like insanely complex strategy games, you the blog reader probably know this about me, so when I talk about them, you might find them of interest and buy them yourself, and Paradox makes more money and makes… well, games I don’t like much. But anyway, USUALLY it works!

But a lot of the appeals I get now are from products that have only the vaguest connection to what I write about, and some of them are… well… from pretty skeevy characters. You see, I debated internally for a few minutes whether to even post that link – not because the core concept (paying street people with a few dollars worth of snack food to hold your signs while mocking them) is offensive, but because it’s also really clear which product is being advertising. And by linking you to them, even indirectly, the guerilla marketing worked. Which is precisely, you know, why it was mailed to me in the first place, with the full knowledge that I would work up a righteous fury over the concept of exploiting the homeless. So, if you follow that link, please assume they’re actually advertising jewel-encrusted Sarah Palin-branded iPods instead. Thanks. 

And quit sending me unsolicited appeals to flog your product. Either it’s related to the gaming industry (in which case I’m at worst a direct competitor and at best aware enough of my surroundings to note it anyway) or it’s just some scheme to milk the Intertubes of money, and, well, again I’m a direct competitor, k?

Oh, and now since I’m an officially trendy blogger, I demand the political elite start listening to my wants and needs. You can start with toning down the Nuremburg rallies.

Too Much Stuff

I’m playing Warhammer, because I can be a Bright Wizard and set things on fire. Longtime readers will know that this is a key requirement of my MMO experience. On the positive side, Warhammer is tons more stable than Age of Conan was, and I can actually run it. On the minus side, I’ve heard rumors that there is an NDA’d test server with a “SECRET PATCH” waiting to go out with class balance changes. If Mythic actually has managed to run a test server with an NDA… well, that’s certainly original. After all, no one really cares about the details of upcoming patches, especially when they contain class balance changes! So on the positive side from that, that is definitely something World of Warcraft isn’t doing. Take that, haters!

But then there’s the Witcher. The Witcher is a great RPG from Poland which lets you play an amoral drugged-up medieval vigilante that leaves a path of sex and violence in his wake. I find this concept cool for some reason. And they just issued an Enhanced Edition which features an English translation that doesn’t suck. No, really. It’s a FEATURE. To be fair, I don’t think anyone really expected a deep RPG from Eastern Europe to have great dialogue that shouldn’t be cheaped out on. But anyway, I should really play that.

But there’s the Force Unleashed. It lets you be a DARK JEDI and THROW STORMTROOPERS AGAINST A WALL.

But there’s Rock Band 2, which is like Rock Band, but TWO!

But there’s my old World of Warcraft guild, which occasionally sends me plaintive IMs asking me to come back, promising they’ll never return to Molten Core ever again!

But there’s

But there’s

But there’s

But there’s not enough hours in the day.

A Programming Note

If your comment is “held for moderation”, that means the spam filter thinks it is spam. Most likely I will never see it, so if you want it to be seen drop me an email (sjennings (a) brokentoys.org) and I’ll bump it back into rotation.

As a general rule comments are never moderated for content. There are very few exceptions:

- obscenity (and it has to be really obscene)
- beating a dead horse (as in, a forum invasion flooding a months-old post)
- spam (“Hi, I run this consulting company and would like to link to it 30 times in this comment”)
- thinly disguised gold-farming ads (personal perogative)
- virulent ad-hominem personal attacks (and again, it has to be pretty bad for me to bother)

If any of this happens, I mark your comment as spam. Which means that anyone using Akismet’s spam filter will block you. Enjoy your stay on the rest of the internet. (Note: this is a joke.) (Further note: maybe.)

Yikes

I was hit by this. When I got the bill for over $500 in my email, the first words in my response to billing were  “Holy CRAP.”

In Your FACES, Koster and Schubert!

Broken Toys: award winning since 2006.

Next year: the Nobel Prize for Snark.

How To Make A Post About Making A Game With 'PvP Done Right'

Just a note: my hysterically self-important PvP post is about as done as it’s going to get, with lots of additions from the vestigal version this morning. Enjoy!