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UO NEWS AND WHIRLED REPORT [Author: Arcadian Del Sol]

Page One: The Dumbest UO Player Ever

The following email entered into evidence for your approval:

—–Original Message—–

From: ##########@aol.com [mailto:#########@aol.com]

Sent: Saturday, April 21, 2001 3:40 PM

To: ######@lumthemad.net

Subject: I have Speed Hack

I would like the world of Ultima Online to know about this wonderful program called Gear which is used to speed your character in pvp which I have been using on Test Center and all pls put a link on your page to my site.

http://www.########.com/###/#######/

At this time, I believe three hundred former members of the “world of Ultima Online” already know about this “wonderful program” but I suspect they have not been using it much in the past two weeks. FREE CLUE: You are Exploiting on a TEST SHARD. This makes you an official Imbecile. A letter of merit from Ed McManus is in the mail.

Page Two: UO:Third Dawn One Step Closer to “Adultima”

Redlow is a name you may or may not be familiar with. Be that as it may, his site has covered just about everything and anything you can imagine. I am not what one might call a habitual reader, but I tend to drop in once or twice a year to see what’s doing. A reader emailed me with news of the lastest incarnation: UO Porn. We knew it would happen, what with every screen that contains at least 3 houses being declared a town or a city or a kingdom, it was only a matter of time before a nudist colony exposed itself. At least now we know where Blackthorne went. Check out the teasingly delicious screenshots here, brought to you by the gnomes of Xrgaming.

Page Three: Free UO Accounts?

Pay-to-view websites are not new. Certain bug sites have been using a “give a bug, get a bug” payment program for quite some time. It seems that in an effort to drum up new business, the pay-to-view hint site uohints.com is now offering free 15 day Ultima Online accounts to new members. Yes, they accept PayPal and they accept shard gold as payment. Of course, if you have hundreds of thousands of gold on Napa Valley, one wonders why you would need a free 15 day account. Can you say Exploitation?

Have breaking News? Write it on a piece of driftwood and cast it in the direction of Upper Manchester. Messages sent at low tide are read first. UO News and Whirled Report is a production of LumCorpNews and not to be confused with CorpNews, NewsCorp, or the WB.