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ALL HAIL! KING OF THE LOSERS!

Checking my referral logs, I noticed something amidst the flotsam of spam fake referrals, google searches for Jessica Chobot porn, and the odd message board post:

Scott Jennings labels Scott Jennings King of the Dorks, decries pedophilia spreading among the Scott Jennings community

Part of this is, of course, my iron-fisted rule over the Scott Jennings community as ranked by Google. So I can see where some whining is warranted. Justified even. I mean, we can’t all be the duly appointed representative of the Jennings clan, right? Sadly, in the end there can only be one official Google-approved Scott Jennings, and it is a mantle I wearily bear.

But, come on. King of the Dorks? From an improv comic director who writes an e/n blog? Sure, he probably goes outside once in a while, and has actual “friends” he “talks about” and a “real life” outside of “levelling video game characters“. But is that any reason to indulge in base name calling? Surely, we in the Jennings-based community can rise above that, and be an example to those benighted folk unfortunate enough to not be named Scott Jennings. We are made of sterner stuff, and held to a higher calling. Like it or not, we Scott Jennings must, as we understand that Jennings is both possessive and singular, understand how this can become a metaphor for life itself.

In the end, we must focus our awe-inspiring Jennings fury on the real enemy – the pedophile Scott Jennings, which Google safely has ensconced away on Page 3. And as King of the Dorks, I decree that there he shall remain. So shall it be written, so shall it be done!