HIT AND RUN [Author: Lum the Mad]

Looking to relocate? To help you decide, Saudi Arabia has banned Pokemon. According to the mufti of Saudi Arabia, Pokemon is too much like gambling. Also, it promotes evolution, which is “rejected by Islam”, and, just in case you weren’t convinced, Pokemon is Jewish.

Most of the cards “figure six-pointed stars, a symbol of international Zionism and the state of Israel” as well as “different-shaped crosses,” [Shiekh Abdul Aziz] said.

Oy vey pika!

I’ve seen it. You can stop sending me the link now. THANKS.

If you’re looking for work now (and at least 85 of you are, you might want to try Wizards of the Coast. According to Salon, it’s a really, um, interesting company to work for.

That honor lay with his dream of revolutionizing corporate culture itself, of making Wizards a new kind of company. We would build an alt-culture workplace of smart young people. We would destroy hierarchies by a resolute program of egalitarian consensus. We would earn fabulous paychecks and free dental treatments. We would encourage diversity in every form.

Best of all, though, we would fuck like rabbits. On “Who Knew? Day” employees wore badges proclaiming their sexual orientation. Intimate relationships sprouted like mold on bread, cutting across departments and seniorities with the hierarchy-smashing fervor of our consensus-driven team meetings. Heedless of status, even peasants and princes coupled, and fell apart.

The example was set right at the top: Peter and his wife, also an employee, had an open marriage. Wizards was a big horny summer camp, and we were starring in the teen sex comedy of our fevered dreams.

Unfortunately, the article then goes on to say that WotC moved on from Plato’s Retreat to, well, Pokemon. AND THAT WAY LIES JUDAISM!

And in case you aren’t a sex-crazed Hasidic Jew with a stash of Pokemon rares, you can always just go kill people, like every other player of role playing games does.