Kongregate, the home of about 3 million flash games, gets bought by Gamestop after realizing that literally no one is buying games in stores any more except for nine year olds that want the old hackable version of GTA San Andreas. Playdom (which some of you may know chiefly for acquiring Raph Koster's company, because you never admit to playing any Facebook games ever) gets bought by Disney for almost eight hundred million dollars. Zynga is acquired by the European Community in exchange for Mark Pincus being granted Slovenia as a feudal overlord, its people now subject to his every mad whim and forced to wear YoVille-branded jester hats on "casual Fridays".
I may have made one of those news entries up. I think.